Since the epic announcement on Conan last night by the master of the jazz flute himself, Ron Burgundy has been causing quite a stir in my universe. First of all, a surprisingly large number of my friends/co-workers/acquaintances have never seen Anchorman. I don’t understand how this is possible. I know that Will Ferrell movies tend to be “all alike” and he always plays “the same character” but I tell ya, there’s something about those velvet suits and the 70’s porn mustache that cracks my shit. If you’re only going to watch one Will Ferrell movie, let it be Anchorman.
Good grief I hope they don’t royally screw this up like they did with the Hangover 2… That movie was just bad. I understand they were under a lot of pressure both time and content-wise, but man. I would rather have paid $11 to watch the first one again. Sequels are by no means easy. You need to capture what made the original great, stay true to the characters, and yet make it different enough to stand on its own (something that Hangover 2 failed at miserably).
Anchorman is one of my all-time favorite movies. One of my best friends from college and I watched it wayyy too much. To this day we sometimes have entire conversations in Anchorman quotes. Plus, Anchorman is so quote-able. It’s filled with some of the best one-liners ever, suitable for all occasions. For example:
If you’re upset: I’m in a glass case of emotion!
If you’re feeling fancy: I have many leather-bound books. And my apartment smells of rich mahogany.
If you’re drinking scotch: I love scotch. Scotchy-scotch-scotch. Here it goes down. Down into my belly.
If you want to start exercising: Veronica and I trying this new fad called uh, jogging. I believe it’s jogging or yogging. it might be a soft j. I’m not sure but apparently you just run for an extended period of time.
If someone mentions Wisconsin: Baxter, is that you? Baxter! Bark twice if you’re in Milwaukee.
If someone mentions a lamp: I love lamp.
If you’re feeling hostile: You’re a smelly pirate hooker.
If you’re in need of a pick-up line: I don’t normally do this, but I felt compelled to tell you something. You have an absolutely breath-taking… heiney. I mean, that thing’s good. I wanna be friends with it.
If you want to be sexist: You’re just a woman with a small brain. With a brain a third the size of ours. It’s science.
If you want to be ignorant: Well, I could be wrong, but I believe diversity is an old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.
If you want to give advice to a friend: You should probably find yourself a safe house or a relative close by. Lay low for a while, because you’re probably wanted for murder.
If you want to use math: They’ve done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works every time.
In a nut shell, I am super excited to get the Channel 4 News Team back onto the big screen, so please don’t eff it up. I beg of you. Just thinking about how funny the first movie was makes me crack up, slightly uncontrollably, and sometimes accidentally do a mild spit-take at my desk. Oops.